Comments on: Therapy doesn’t work after all http://treewoman.wordpress.com/2008/06/03/therapy-doesnt-work-after-all/ Musings and wanderings of a curious and introverted mind Sat, 30 Aug 2008 12:34:30 +0000 http://wordpress.com/ hourly 1 By: Katherine http://treewoman.wordpress.com/2008/06/03/therapy-doesnt-work-after-all/#comment-69 Katherine Wed, 18 Jun 2008 13:10:38 +0000 http://treewoman.wordpress.com/?p=83#comment-69 Even though I don't know you, I feel as though I do. I've been to therapy for years, and they never told me anything I didnt already know. I wish I had the right words to give you. If anything, you are an exquisite writer, and I envy you going to France (albeit its beautiful). I don't know you, but I do know that the world needs more people like you. You are good with words, and probably smarter than 95% of the people I see on a daily basis. Good things will come. Expecially to people like you. When you least expect it. :) Even though I don’t know you, I feel as though I do.
I’ve been to therapy for years, and they never told me anything I didnt already know.
I wish I had the right words to give you.
If anything, you are an exquisite writer, and I envy you going to France (albeit its beautiful).
I don’t know you, but I do know that the world needs more people like you. You are good with words, and probably smarter than 95% of the people I see on a daily basis.
Good things will come.
Expecially to people like you.
When you least expect it.

:)

]]> By: passingBy http://treewoman.wordpress.com/2008/06/03/therapy-doesnt-work-after-all/#comment-67 passingBy Mon, 09 Jun 2008 19:46:41 +0000 http://treewoman.wordpress.com/?p=83#comment-67 [i]I’m watching myself engage into it and all I do is think “how interesting, so it’s happening after all, now I know how it’s really like”.[/i] Maybe this is actually progress, but you just don't recognize it as such? In my experience, these changes take a lot of time, practice, support, and repetition. So, while you may be repeating an old pattern, you're at least fully aware of what's happening, while it's happening. Which is pretty dang cool! As well as being frustrating and maddening. But next time - next time maybe you'll see the pattern even sooner, and will be able to make different choices, because now you're more aware and are sick of the pattern. Have you ever heard the 'hole in the sidewalk' metaphor for emotional growth? Sorry it's kind of long, but I'll just cut and paste it here: THERE'S A HOLE IN MY SIDEWALK Autobiography in Five Short Chapters By Portia Nelson Chapter One I walk down the street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I fall in. I am lost .... I am helpless. It isn't my fault. It takes forever to find a way out. Chapter Two I walk down the street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I pretend that I don't see it. I fall in again. I can't believe I am in this same place. But, it isn't my fault. It still takes a long time to get out. Chapter Three I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I see it is there. I still fall in ... it's a habit ... but, my eyes are open. I know where I am. It is my fault. I get out immediately. Chapter Four I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I walk around it. Chapter Five I walk down another street. [i]I’m watching myself engage into it and all I do is think “how interesting, so it’s happening after all, now I know how it’s really like”.[/i]

Maybe this is actually progress, but you just don’t recognize it as such? In my experience, these changes take a lot of time, practice, support, and repetition. So, while you may be repeating an old pattern, you’re at least fully aware of what’s happening, while it’s happening. Which is pretty dang cool! As well as being frustrating and maddening. But next time – next time maybe you’ll see the pattern even sooner, and will be able to make different choices, because now you’re more aware and are sick of the pattern.

Have you ever heard the ‘hole in the sidewalk’ metaphor for emotional growth? Sorry it’s kind of long, but I’ll just cut and paste it here:

THERE’S A HOLE IN MY SIDEWALK
Autobiography in Five Short Chapters
By Portia Nelson

Chapter One
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost …. I am helpless.
It isn’t my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.

Chapter Two
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend that I don’t see it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I am in this same place.
But, it isn’t my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.

Chapter Three
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in … it’s a habit … but, my eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.

Chapter Four
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

Chapter Five
I walk down another street.

]]> By: Graeme http://treewoman.wordpress.com/2008/06/03/therapy-doesnt-work-after-all/#comment-63 Graeme Tue, 03 Jun 2008 17:55:56 +0000 http://treewoman.wordpress.com/?p=83#comment-63 Hey Treewoman! You know we are all thinking of you, sometimes when things are going well a little setback can knock us for six - you know you'll come out of it stronger in the end. As Dragonlady says you have plenty of people ready to listen if needs be; and if all else fails hop on a plane as Jools suggests and come for a visit for a while ;-) Take care! Hey Treewoman! You know we are all thinking of you, sometimes when things are going well a little setback can knock us for six – you know you’ll come out of it stronger in the end. As Dragonlady says you have plenty of people ready to listen if needs be; and if all else fails hop on a plane as Jools suggests and come for a visit for a while ;-)

Take care!

]]> By: Jools http://treewoman.wordpress.com/2008/06/03/therapy-doesnt-work-after-all/#comment-62 Jools Tue, 03 Jun 2008 17:06:11 +0000 http://treewoman.wordpress.com/?p=83#comment-62 Be strong my dear and do what you know you must for your own sanity. If you do this thing then you will prove to yourself that you are strong, just as we know you are deep down. Is there any way you can get to our house? you are welcome to stay as long as you wish, all we ask is you do the dishes because we hate doing that ;-) I'm trying to make you smile but I just don't know how, as Dragonlady says I'm here to listen but from this distance there's not much else I can do. I could of course send Graeme and the 'boys' around to help. (((((BIG HUGS))))) Be strong my dear and do what you know you must for your own sanity. If you do this thing then you will prove to yourself that you are strong, just as we know you are deep down.

Is there any way you can get to our house? you are welcome to stay as long as you wish, all we ask is you do the dishes because we hate doing that ;-)

I’m trying to make you smile but I just don’t know how, as Dragonlady says I’m here to listen but from this distance there’s not much else I can do.

I could of course send Graeme and the ‘boys’ around to help.

(((((BIG HUGS)))))

]]> By: Dragonlady http://treewoman.wordpress.com/2008/06/03/therapy-doesnt-work-after-all/#comment-61 Dragonlady Tue, 03 Jun 2008 16:45:20 +0000 http://treewoman.wordpress.com/?p=83#comment-61 ... I wish I knew what to do. On one side I see that you are much happier than when you arrived here. But I also see how this is weighing on you. I wish I could be a good friend and help. I know I can't tell you to dump that guy, or anything, it's your choice. But I can listen. You know I am here anytime don't you? …
I wish I knew what to do. On one side I see that you are much happier than when you arrived here. But I also see how this is weighing on you.
I wish I could be a good friend and help. I know I can’t tell you to dump that guy, or anything, it’s your choice. But I can listen. You know I am here anytime don’t you?

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